Lets try this again

So, I got lazy and complacent last time I tried to start this, lets see if I can get it rolling this time.

Last week I probably had one of my worst days in quite a while. I was kindly informed that I screwed up so bad last time I was enrolled in college, that none of the local universities will grant me admission. After all the hoops they made me jump through, including calling a school I never went to, to have them fax the school I was applying to, just to tell them I indeed never attended their school, I simply pissed the chance away 3 years ago.

Now I do not have the biggest ego around, but it definitely brought me down a little knowing that I now actually want to be in school learning something, and I cannot because before I did not care. I thought I had a plan in my head to do certain things and have something accomplished by the time I am done with my commitment. I kind of gave up, did not know what to do, where to go or who to talk to. I could not convince anyone to admit me, even though I could pass any entrance test they have, and considering the general education level of the state I am in, and pass it with flying colors.

This is one of those situations where I could just shut down and say “eff it, I quit” and continue doing what I have been doing for the past 4 years, just getting by. And you know what, I did for a couple days, because I was quite simply exhausting myself worrying about what to do next.

It has led me to one thing for certain though, and that is I need to put myself back in control of the things in my life. That does not mean I need to control everything, but the things that are perfectly controllable, that fall squarely on my shoulders, I need to get them back in line. Including but not limited to, finances, school/grades, health, fitness, and my free time. I can and will enroll in some online schooling to get my grades to an acceptable level to transfer into one of the local schools. I really need to concentrate on rehabbing my ankle so I can do the things that I really want to do. Free time, well, I think less random tv and more books is probably a good option as well.

Lastly for now, this past weekend I did go see the new Tron: Legacy, which I thoroughly enjoyed. I enjoyed it even more the second time around, after re-watching the original again, and spotting a few more hints/odes to the original. I realized that I do really enjoy movies, and not just the movie theater experience, but movies in general. If you have ever had me around and there was an actor or movie we couldn’t quite think of, I am sure I quickly referenced IMDB.com for the information. They have a top 250 movies of all time there, voted on by users, and I have realized that there are so many good films that I have never made the point of watching. I think one thing that I really want to do, is start at 100 and go to zero and review all of them. Whether I have seen them once, twice, twenty, or no times, watch it again and review it. Not only on its own but possible in context to its place on the list. Now I know that a list like this is fairly subjective and opinionated, but with the amount of votes most of these movies have, that’s a pretty accurate rating for the movies. So my next step in that is trying to find where im going to have to look for movies like Metropolis(1921), and then get a webcam so I can do video reviews as well as written ones here.

Life is an adventure, and I have forgotten that as of late, so its time to start exploring again and enjoying the things that are right there for the taking.